Two

by Natsume Sōseki

The steamboat came to a stop with a "buu" sound, and the barge drifted away from the shore, rowing closer. The boatman was completely naked, wearing only a red fundoshi. What a barbaric place this is. In this heat, I couldn't possibly wear a kimono. The sunlight was strong, and the water's surface sparkled dazzlingly. If I stared at it for too long, my eyes would get dazzled. When I asked the clerk, it seemed that this was the place to get off. Looking around, it appeared to be a fishing village like Omori. I thought there was no way I could endure a place like this, but it couldn't be helped. Steeling myself, I jumped in first. Following me, five or six others boarded. After loading about four large boxes, the boatman in the red fundoshi rowed back to the shore.

Once on land, I quickly jumped up and caught a snot-nosed kid standing on the rocks, asking, "Where is the middle school?" The kid, looking dazed, replied, "I don't know." What an unhelpful country bumpkin. It's such a small town, yet he doesn't even know where the middle school is. Then, a man dressed in a strange coat came over and said, "Come this way," so I followed him to an inn called "Minato-ya." The women there all said in unison, "Please come in," which made me reluctant to go up. When I asked at the entrance for the location of the middle school, the innkeeper said, "You have to go about two ri by train to get to the middle school." I became even more reluctant to go up. The man in the strange coat pulled out my two leather bags and started to walk away slowly. The innkeepers looked at him with strange expressions.

I quickly found the parking lot. I was able to buy a ticket easily. When I boarded, the train felt just like a matchbox. After rolling along for about five minutes, I had to get off already. That’s why the ticket was so cheap. It was only three sen. After that, I hired a carriage to head to the middle school, but it was already after school and no one was there. The janitor told me he had gone out for a bit. What a relaxed janitor he is. I thought about asking the principal, but I got tired, so I asked the coachman to take me back to the inn. The coachman cheerfully pulled up to an inn called "Yamashiroya." I found it a bit amusing that Yamashiroya had the same name as the pawnshop run by Kantarou.

I was guided to a dark room under the Kaiko stage on the second floor. It was too hot to stay there. When I said I didn't like such a room, they threw down their leather bag and left, saying, "Unfortunately, everything is blocked." With no other choice, I entered the room and endured while sweating. Eventually, I was told to "get in the bath," and I jumped in, but quickly got out. When I peeked in on my way back, I saw that there were many cool-looking rooms available. What a rude person. They lied. After that, a maid brought in a meal. The room was hot, but the food was much tastier than at the boarding house. While serving, the maid asked, "Where did you come from?" so I replied, "I came from Tokyo." Then she said, "Tokyo is a nice place, isn't it?" and I answered, "Of course." When the maid took away the meal and went to the kitchen, I heard a loud laugh. Thinking it was silly, I tried to go to sleep, but I couldn't fall asleep easily. It was not only hot but also noisy. It was about five times noisier than the boarding house. As I was dozing off, I dreamed of Kiyoshi. Kiyoshi was munching on some Echigo bamboo candy, eating it along with the bamboo. When I said it was poisonous and he should stop, he replied, "No, this bamboo is medicine," and continued to eat it deliciously. I was so astonished that I opened my mouth wide and laughed, "Hahaha," and then I woke up. The maid was opening the storm shutters. As usual, the sky was brilliantly clear.

I had heard that one should pay for tea during the journey. I had also heard that if you don't pay for tea, you will be treated poorly. Being shoved into such a narrow and dark room must be because I didn't pay for tea. It's probably because I'm dressed in shabby clothes, carrying a canvas bag and a woolen bat umbrella. Even though I'm a country bumpkin, I looked down on others. I thought I would surprise them by paying the most for tea. In fact, I had about thirty yen left over from my school expenses when I left for Tokyo. Even after deducting the cost of train and boat tickets and miscellaneous expenses, I still have about fourteen yen left. Even if I spend it all, it doesn't matter since I will be receiving a salary from now on. Country folks are so stingy that if I give them five yen, they will surely be shocked and dizzy. I thought I would see what would happen, so after washing my face, I returned to the room, and the maid from last night brought in the meal. While serving with the tray, she was grinning. What a rude person. Is she celebrating something in her face? Even so, my face is much better than that maid's. I had planned to wait until after the meal, but it annoyed me, so I pulled out a five-yen bill midway and said, "Take this to the accounting office later," and the maid made a strange face. After that, I finished my meal and immediately headed to school. I hadn't polished my shoes.

The school was approached by car yesterday, so I had a rough idea of where it was. After turning at the corners two or three times, I immediately arrived in front of the gate. The path from the gate to the entrance is paved with granite. Yesterday, when I drove over this pavement, it made a loud clattering sound that was somewhat unsettling. Along the way, I encountered many students wearing the Ogura uniform, and they all entered through this gate. Among them, there were some who were taller and looked stronger than me. The thought of teaching someone like that made me feel somewhat uneasy. When I presented my business card, I was ushered into the principal's office. The principal was a man with a thin mustache, dark complexion, and large eyes, resembling a raccoon. He seemed rather pompous. "Well, make sure to study hard," he said, respectfully handing me a large, stamped appointment letter. I rolled up this letter and threw it into the sea when I returned to Tokyo. The principal said, "I'll introduce you to the staff soon, so make sure to show this appointment letter to each of them." That seemed like unnecessary trouble. It would be better to just post this letter in the staff room for three days than to go through such a hassle.

The teachers gather in the staff room and must wait until the first bell rings. There is still plenty of time. The principal took out a clock and stared at it, intending to start speaking slowly, but first began to talk at length about the spirit of education. Naturally, I was listening half-heartedly, but halfway through, I thought this was an outrageous situation. It seemed impossible to do what the principal was saying. To be told that someone reckless like me must become a model for the students, be revered as a representative of the school, and that one must cultivate personal virtue beyond academics to be an educator was an unreasonable demand. Such a distinguished person would never come to this countryside for a monthly salary of forty yen. I thought that people are generally similar, and anyone would get into a fight if they got angry, but judging by this situation, it seemed one could hardly speak or even take a walk. If the role is that difficult, they should have discussed it properly before hiring. I dislike lying, so reluctantly, I resigned myself to the fact that I was deceived into coming here and thought about boldly declining and going home. I had paid five yen to the inn, so I only had nine yen left in my wallet. Nine yen wouldn't be enough to get back to Tokyo. I regretted not having paid for tea; it was a waste. However, I thought I could manage with nine yen. Even if the travel expenses were insufficient, I thought it was better than lying, so I said, "I cannot do as you say, and I will return this appointment." The principal blinked his raccoon-like eyes and looked at my face. Eventually, he laughed and said that what I just said was merely a hope, and he knew well that I wouldn't be able to fulfill that hope, so I didn't need to worry. If he knew that, he shouldn't have intimidated me from the start.

Before long, the trumpet sounded. The classroom suddenly began to buzz. It was said that the teachers must have gathered in the staff room by now, so I followed the principal into the teachers' lounge. Desks were lined up around the spacious, narrow room, and everyone was seated. When I entered, everyone turned to look at my face all at once. It wasn't a spectacle. Then, as instructed, I went to each person one by one to hand over their appointment letters and greet them. For the most part, they just leaned forward slightly from their chairs, but those who were more meticulous took the appointment letter I handed them, glanced through it, and then returned it respectfully. It was like imitating a court play. By the time I got to the gymnastics teacher as the fifteenth person, it became a bit frustrating to repeat the same thing over and over. While they could finish in one go, I was repeating the same actions fifteen times. I wish they would consider other people's feelings a little.

While I was greeting people, there was a person who seemed to be the vice principal. He is said to be a Bachelor of Literature. Speaking of a Bachelor of Literature, he must be a respectable person since he is a university graduate. He had a strangely gentle voice that was almost feminine. What surprised me the most was that he was wearing a flannel shirt despite the heat. Although the fabric was thin, it must be unbearable in this heat. Being a Bachelor of Literature, he probably wore clothes that reflected his struggles, but since it was a red shirt, I felt somewhat mocked. Later, I heard that this man wears a red shirt all year round. It seems he has a peculiar illness. According to his explanation, red is good for the body, so he specially ordered it for hygiene reasons. However, if that's the case, he should wear a red kimono and hakama as well. Then there was a pale-faced man named Koga who was the English teacher. Generally, people with pale faces tend to be thin, but this man was puffed up and blue. When I was in elementary school, there was a classmate named Asai, and his father had a similar complexion. I asked Kiyoshi if farmers end up with such faces, and he told me that it wasn't that, but rather that the man ate too many unripe eggplants, which made him puff up. Ever since then, whenever I see someone puffed up and blue, I think it's a consequence of eating unripe eggplants. This English teacher must also be eating nothing but unripe ones. However, I still don't know what unripe actually means. I have asked Kiyoshi about it, but he just laughed and didn't answer. Perhaps Kiyoshi doesn't know either. Then, there was a man named Hotta who was the same math teacher as me. He was a robust chestnut-headed fellow, with a face resembling that of a wicked monk from Eizan. When someone politely showed him the appointment letter, he didn't even look and said, "Oh, you must be the new person, come play for a bit.He said, "Come play with me." What do you mean by "come play with me"? Who would go to someone who doesn't know such manners? From that moment, I gave this monk the nickname "Yamaarashi." The Chinese literature teacher was indeed strict. He arrived yesterday and must be quite tired, but even so, he started the class and was doing quite well—he was an amiable old man who talked endlessly. The art teacher was completely like an entertainer, wearing a flashy kimono and snapping a fan while asking, "Where are you from?" and when I replied, "Eh? Tokyo? That's wonderful, I have a companion now... With this, I am also a person from Edo," I thought to myself that if this is what an Edo person is like, I wouldn't want to be born in Edo. There are many more things I could write about each person, but I will stop because there is no end to it.

Once the greetings were finished, the principal said, "You can go home for today. However, please discuss matters related to the classes with the head of mathematics and start the lessons from the day after tomorrow." When I asked who the head of mathematics was, it turned out to be that Yamaarashi. I was disappointed to think that I would have to work under this annoying person. Yamaarashi left, saying, "Hey you, where are you staying? Yamashiro-ya? Alright, I will go consult with you soon," and took his chalk to head to the classroom. It's quite ignorant of him to come from over there to consult, even though he is the head. However, it's better than calling me over.

As soon as I stepped out of the school gate, I thought about returning to the inn, but reconsidered, thinking there was no point in going back, and decided to take a stroll around town. As I walked aimlessly, I came across the old prefectural office building and the barracks. They weren't as impressive as the Azabu regiment, but they were still somewhat worth seeing. I also checked out the main street, but it had a width that resembled a narrower version of Kagurazaka, and the townscape left a less favorable impression. Even though it was a castle town with a quarter of a million koku, it was ultimately just as I expected. Seeing the people living in such a place acting so proud made me feel somewhat sorry for them.

While I was walking and thinking about such things, I found myself in front of Yamashiro-ya before I knew it. It seemed spacious, but in reality, it was narrow, and I had probably seen most of the attractions by now. As I passed through the gate to go back and have a meal, the landlady, upon seeing my face, suddenly rushed out and said, "Welcome back," bowing her head to the wooden floor. After taking off my shoes and stepping inside, a maid guided me to the second floor, saying, "The parlor has become available."

In the spacious fifteen-tatami room, there was a large tokonoma, and for the first time in my life, I entered such an impressive parlor. Thinking I didn't know when I would be able to enter again, I took off my clothes and put on just a yukata, then lay down in the middle of the parlor in a star shape. It felt pleasant.

After finishing lunch, I promptly wrote a letter to Kiyo. I hated writing letters because I was bad at writing and didn't know many characters. However, thinking that Kiyo would be worried, I splurged and wrote a long letter. The content was as follows.

"I arrived yesterday. It's a boring place. I'm sleeping in a fifteen-tatami parlor. I paid five yen for tea at the inn. The landlady rubbed her head against the wooden floor. I couldn't sleep last night. I dreamed that Kiyo was eating bamboo candy along with the bamboo. I will return next summer. Today I went to school and gave everyone nicknames. The principal is Tanuki, the vice principal is Akashatsu, the English teacher is Uranari, the math teacher is Yama-arashi, and the art teacher is Nodaiko. I will write various things soon. Goodbye."

After finishing the letter, a pleasant fatigue set in, and I lay down in the middle of the tatami room in a large star shape. This time, I didn't dream and fell into a deep sleep. I was awakened by a loud voice saying, "Is this the room?" and it turned out to be Yama-arashi who had come in. At first, he apologized for the intrusion, but as soon as he started talking, I was surprised. When I asked about the subjects he was in charge of, it didn't seem particularly difficult, so I agreed. I wouldn't be surprised if I were told to start tomorrow or the day after with something like this.

After finishing the lesson planning, Yama-arashi said, "How long do you plan to stay in this inn? I can introduce you to a good boarding house, so you should move." He said that outsiders wouldn't understand, but if he spoke, it could be arranged immediately. He thought it would be better to see it today, move tomorrow, and start school the day after. Certainly, I couldn't stay in a fifteen-tatami room forever. Even if I paid my entire salary for rent, it might not be enough. It was a bit disappointing to splurge on five yen for tea and move immediately, but I thought it would be more convenient to move quickly and settle in if I was going to move anyway, so I decided to ask Yama-arashi for help.

Then Yama-arashi said, "Anyway, just come with me," so I followed him. The house located halfway up a hill on the outskirts of town was very quiet. The owner was a man named Ikakin who dealt in antiques, and his wife was a woman about four years older than him. I had learned the word "witch" when I was in middle school, and this wife resembled a witch exactly. After all, a witch is still someone's wife, so it doesn't matter.

In the end, I decided to move starting tomorrow. On the way back, Yama-arashi treated me to a glass of ice water in the town. When I met him at school, I thought he was a rude guy with a crosswind, but seeing how he took care of me in various ways, he didn't seem like a bad man after all. However, it seems he shares the same impatience and short temper as I do. Later, I heard that he was the most respected among the students.