Dogura Magura (5/47)

by Hisashi Yumeno

The tears eventually stopped, and the lonely rose color that had settled on her cheeks returned to its original innocent pink, like the light of dawn. As her expression remained motionless like a doll, it transformed back into the healthy sleeping face of a girl around seventeen or eighteen years old. Perhaps she had aged five or six years in a brief dream, filled with sorrow. And as I stared, it seemed she had rejuvenated back to her original self... and at the corners of her lips, a gentle smile began to appear.

I let out a long sigh from the bottom of my heart, feeling as if I had not fully awakened from a dream. I quietly turned to look behind me.

Dr. Wakabayashi, who had been standing behind me, was looking down at me with a blank expression, his hands clasped behind his back. However, it seemed he was extremely tense inside, as conveyed by his waxy, stiff complexion. When I turned around, he quietly met my gaze, licked his pale lips, and spoke in a voice that was completely different from before, lacking any resonance.

“...Do you know this person's... name?”

I turned back to the girl's sleeping face once more. I shook my head quietly, as if to express my concern about my surroundings.

...No... not at all...

At that moment, Dr. Wakabayashi whispered again in a low voice.

“...Then... do you at least remember this person's face?”

I looked up at Dr. Wakabayashi's face and blinked several times.

...Absolutely not... How could I remember anyone else's face when I didn't even know my own...

It was as if to say.

Then, at that moment, disappointment flickered across Dr. Wakabayashi's expression once more. After staring at me with a vacant gaze for a while, he returned to his original lonely expression, nodded lightly two or three times, and quietly turned back to face the girl. He stepped forward with a very solemn gait, looking down at me with both hands clasped in front of him as if to vow something before a deity. He spoke in an insinuating and gentle tone.

“...Then... I must inform you. This person is your only cousin and is engaged to you.”

“...Ah...”

I swallowed my voice of surprise. Holding my forehead, I staggered backward, nearly falling. I doubted my own eyes and ears, raising a hoarse voice.

“...S-such a thing... someone so beautiful...”

“...Indeed, she is an extraordinarily beautiful person. But there is no mistake. This year... on April 26th of the 15th year of Taisho... just six months ago, she was about to marry you, your only cousin. Due to a most mysterious event that occurred the night before, she has been living this unfortunate life until today...”

“........................”

“...Therefore... it is my final and significant responsibility, entrusted to me by Dr. Masaki, to ensure that both you and this lady can safely be discharged... and return to a joyful married life.”

Dr. Wakabayashi's tone was slow and solemn, as if to intimidate me.

However, I could only turn back to the bed, wide-eyed as if caught by a fox. The eerie feeling of being suddenly pointed at by someone I had never seen before, a girl who looked like a celestial maiden, and being told, 'She is yours'... the doubt... and the absurdity of it all...

“...My... only cousin... but... just now... you said sister...”

“That was a dream. As I mentioned earlier, this young lady has no siblings from the beginning; she is the only daughter... However, there is a record that her ancestor, a woman from a thousand years ago, had an older sister. You are dreaming of that direct older sister now...”

“...How do you... know such a thing...?”

I asked, my voice trembling. I looked up at Dr. Wakabayashi, unable to help but retreat slowly. Suddenly, I began to doubt Dr. Wakabayashi's intellect. It should be impossible for anyone other than a magician to accurately describe the contents of a person's dream... especially when he casually explained bizarre facts from a thousand years ago that transcended reasoning and imagination... Perhaps Dr. Wakabayashi was not an ordinary human from the beginning. I began to suspect that he might be one of the special patients confined in this mental hospital, just like me.

However, Dr. Wakabayashi did not show any sign of being surprised at all. He answered in a tone that was still that of a scientist, with an indifferent, fragmented voice.

“...That is because this young lady has been saying and doing such things even while she is awake... Look at this strange hairstyle. This way of styling her hair is reminiscent of the hairstyle of married women from the time of this young lady's ancestor a thousand years ago, and it is sometimes styled like this... In other words, while this young lady is still a pure virgin, during the time she is styled like this, her entire mental life returns to the habits, memories, and personality of a certain married woman who was her ancestor a thousand years ago. At that time, everything from her gaze to her movements becomes completely unrecognizable as that of a virgin, and she appears as a mature, elegant young lady, so much so that her age seems to change... Of course, while she is forgetting such dreams, she is tied up like any other patient...”

I was left speechless, my mouth agape. I couldn't help but compare the mysterious hairstyle with Dr. Wakabayashi's solemn face.

“...So when you said brother...”

“That refers to your ancestor from a thousand years ago. You are dreaming of the scene where your ancestor's older sister's husband, who was your ancestor, is living together with this young lady.”

“...Such a disgraceful... affair...”

I began to shout but instinctively swallowed my words. Seeing Dr. Wakabayashi's pale hand move slowly, I felt as if I were being restrained.

“Shh... Quiet... if you remember your name now, everything will...”

Once Dr. Wakabayashi finished speaking, he fell silent. The two of us turned to look at the girl on the bed simultaneously. However, it was already too late.

It seemed our voices had reached the girl's ears. Her small red lips began to twitch, and as she quietly opened her eyes, she stared at my face, which was standing right next to her. She blinked several times, and then her double-lidded eyes sparkled for a moment, her cheeks turning pale as if surprised by something. Her moist black eyes shone with an otherworldly beauty, and her cheeks suddenly flushed bright red up to her ears.

“...Ah... Brother... why are you here...?”

She cried out as if her soul had been taken away, sitting up. Barefoot, she jumped off the bed, trying to cling to me with her hem exposed.

I was astonished. Unconsciously, I brushed her hand away and instinctively took two or three steps back, glaring at her... completely taken aback.

At that moment, the girl also stopped. With her hands outstretched, she froze as if struck by electricity. Her face turned pale, and even the color of her lips faded... Meanwhile, she opened her eyes wide, staring at my face, and slowly backed away, supporting herself on the bed with both hands. Trembling her lips, she continued to gaze intently at my face.

The girl was fearfully looking around at Dr. Wakabayashi's face and the room, but soon tears began to well up in her eyes. She slumped down, collapsing onto the stone floor, pressed the sleeve of her white patient gown to her face, and let out a loud cry, sobbing on the bed.

I was even more astonished. Wiping the sweat that had erupted all over my face, I compared the back of the sobbing girl with Dr. Wakabayashi's face.

However, Dr. Wakabayashi approached the girl calmly, without moving a muscle in his face, coolly looking back at my astonished expression, and bent down. He leaned in to ask her.

“Do you remember her name... and your own name...?”

When I heard those words, I was more surprised than the girl. Could it be that this girl, like me, was on the verge of awakening from a state of 'ego loss' in a dreamlike wandering state... Was Dr. Wakabayashi attempting the same experiment on this girl as he was on me... My ears rang with tension as I awaited the girl's response.

However, the girl did not respond. She simply stopped crying for a moment, buried her face deeper into the bed, and shook her head from side to side.

“...Then you do remember that this lady is the brother you were engaged to.”

The girl nodded. Then, she began to cry even more intensely, in a higher voice.

It was a voice that, even to an outsider, was truly heart-wrenching, a gut-wrenching sound. She was left behind in a world of mental patients, far removed from her lover, unable to remember his name... and now, even as she finally encountered him and tried to cling to him, she was met with cold rejection, and she was beginning to painfully realize her situation.

Despite the difference between genders, I was experiencing the same mental state and suffering, and I was deeply drawn to her hoarse cries. This morning, when I was called in the dark, it was completely different... no, I was now placed in a position of suffering several times more than before. The girl's face and name still eluded me, and now, her painful cries, which made it unbearable to not help her remember, and her pitiful back trembling as she lay crying on the white bed, felt as if it were entirely my responsibility, tormenting me as I covered my face with both hands, drenched in cold sweat. I felt faint and was on the verge of collapsing.

However, Dr. Wakabayashi, unaware of my suffering, continued to gently stroke the girl's shoulder, leaning forward.

“...C-calm down... You will remember soon. This lady and your brother have also forgotten your face. But you will remember soon. Then they will tell you right away. And you will be discharged together... So... quietly, good night. Wait for the right time. It is not far away...”

After saying this, Dr. Wakabayashi looked up. He took my hand, which was standing there in shock, surprised, weakened, and wiping away tears, and quickly led me out the door, closing the heavy door firmly behind us without hesitation. In the hallway, he called over the attendant, who was fussing with the cockscomb flowers, clapping his hands, and while urging me, who was still hesitating, he guided me back into Room 7.

As I listened closely, it seemed the girl's cries had quieted down considerably. In between her sobs, I sensed the attendant was saying something to her.

Standing on the artificial stone floor, I let out a deep sigh and tried to calm myself. For the time being, I looked up at Dr. Wakabayashi, waiting for an explanation.

Something I had never even dreamed of was happening right before my eyes. In the next room, an extraordinarily beautiful girl, whom I had never seen before, was confined as a miserable mental patient. That beautiful girl was my only cousin and my fiancée. It felt as if I were dreaming that I, the husband of her sister from a thousand years ago, was living together with her.

When she woke from the dream, she saw my face and cried out, 'Brother,' trying to cling to me. However, because I rejected her, she collapsed to the floor, mourning as if her insides were being twisted.

I was eagerly waiting to see what kind of explanation Dr. Wakabayashi would provide for such an extraordinary situation. However, he suddenly fell silent, glanced at me with cold, pale eyes, then quietly lowered his gaze and began searching his coat pocket with his left hand. He took out a large silver pocket watch and placed it in the palm of his hand. He began to measure his pulse while looking at the watch.

Dr. Wakabayashi, who was in poor health, might have made it a habit to check his pulse at this time every morning. However, there was not a trace of the tension that had been present just moments ago. Instead, a cold indifference, as if he were a stranger met on the roadside, enveloped him. His small eyes were downcast like a ghost, his white lips were tightly closed, and the fingers measuring his pulse pressed firmly or loosened, as if trying to suppress my excitement.

It seemed he was ignoring my excitement over the bizarre events that had unfolded in the next room. In this strange world where the past, present, and future, dreams and reality intertwined, he introduced the girl, who was entangled in a double or triple love affair, as 'your cousin, and at the same time, your fiancée,' while showing me the evidence right before my eyes, and it seemed he was avoiding my questions.

I felt a sense of dissatisfaction, not knowing what to do, and I looked down while fiddling with my hat. Then, at that moment, a feeling arose that I was being mocked by Dr. Wakabayashi.

For some reason, it felt as if Dr. Wakabayashi was trying to plant something in my head. He seemed to be presenting an astonishing fabrication, trying to make me believe something baseless. As that suspicion arose in my mind, it felt as if it were true, and gradually that thought began to spread.

Capturing me, who knew nothing, and dressing me up as a university student, introducing the beautiful girl as my fiancée, seemed suspicious. The clothes and hat were perhaps tailored while I was in a dreamlike state. That girl might also be some sort of sexual maniac confined in this hospital, behaving strangely toward everyone. This hospital might not even be Kyushu Imperial University. Dr. Wakabayashi might be trying to drag me into some kind of illusion for some reason. Otherwise, I would not be able to meet a beautiful girl who is supposedly my fiancée without remembering anything from the past. I should feel nostalgia and joy.

Indeed, I was certainly being set up.

As I realized this, the questions, doubts, and surprises in my head gradually faded away. And before I knew it, my mind returned to its original state. I had no responsibilities or worries.

However, along with that, I became completely alone, and a somewhat unreliable, lonely feeling washed over me. I let out another thin sigh, and when I looked up, it seemed Dr. Wakabayashi had finished checking his pulse, returned the pocket watch to his pocket, and reverted to the polite demeanor he had when we first met this morning.

“How are you? Are you feeling tired?”

I nodded, trying to maintain my composure, while still feeling taken aback by Dr. Wakabayashi's seemingly casual attitude.

“No. Not at all...”

“Then, may I continue the examination to help you recall your past?”

I nodded again, feeling indifferent. Dr. Wakabayashi nodded in agreement with that tone.

“Then, I will take you to the professor's office in the main building of the psychiatric department of Kyushu Imperial University. This is the room where Dr. Masaki Takeyuki spent his time until the day he passed away. While you look at the memorabilia of your past displayed here, I believe the mysterious puzzle regarding you will gradually be unraveled. Ultimately, I believe all your past memories will be restored. Then, the truth of the strange incident with that young lady will also be revealed...”

There seemed to be a solid conviction in Dr. Wakabayashi's words, as if they were forged from iron, and they felt like they contained some significant implication.

However, I was indifferent to those words and merely lowered my head slightly. I was fine with being taken anywhere. After all, things would turn out as they would... I had that kind of careless feeling. At the same time, I also held a slight curiosity about what kind of strange things he would show me next.

Dr. Wakabayashi nodded with satisfaction. “Then, please follow me.”

The main building of the psychiatric department of Kyushu Imperial University was a two-story wooden Western-style building painted blue, which also included a bathhouse. We walked straight back through the long hallway, passing the flower garden we had come through earlier, and came upon a heavy iron door that resembled a prison entrance. That door was pulled open with a rumbling sound by a guard peering in from somewhere, and we stepped into a dark, empty entrance.

The entrance door was firmly closed, but perhaps it was still early in the morning. Relying on the faint blue light filtering in from the window above the door, we climbed the steep stairs on the left side, making a clattering sound, and turned right, where a bright south-facing hallway opened up. On the right side, there were several rooms with wooden signs labeled 'Laboratory' and 'Library.' At the end of the hallway, there was a brown door with 'No Entry... Dean of Medicine' written in large letters.

Dr. Wakabayashi, who led the way, took out a large key with a wooden tag from his inner pocket and opened that door. Turning back, he invited me in, politely removing his coat and hanging it on the hat rack next to the door. I followed suit, hanging my frosted overcoat and top hat. Seeing our shoe prints left on the floor, it seemed the room was covered in a thin layer of dust.

The room was spacious and bright. Of the twelve windows lined up on the north, west, and south sides, the eight windows on the north and west were covered with dark green pine branches, while the four windows on the south side were unobstructed, allowing the light of the blue morning sky to flood in like a deluge, accompanied by the sound of nearby waves. Dr. Wakabayashi's slender morning attire and my somewhat awkward uniform created a strange contrast, as if we were in a place far removed from the real world.

At that moment, Dr. Wakabayashi raised his slender right hand and pointed around the room. Simultaneously, a weak voice from a high place left a pleasant echo in every corner of the room.

“This room originally served as both the library and specimen room for the psychiatric department. The books and specimens here are research materials and reference materials for the psychiatric department that the former chief professor, Dr. Juuhachi Saito, painstakingly gathered, as well as items related to the patients who were in this hospital, some of which are a source of pride in the academic world. However, after Dr. Saito passed away, when Dr. Masaki Takeyuki took over as chief professor in February of this year, he moved all the literature from the eastern half of this room, which was bright and good, to the previous professor's office, remodeled the space into his living room, and even installed that beautiful fireplace. Moreover, it became clear that this was done without the permission of the president and without following formal procedures, which caused great alarm for the head office's official, Tsukae, who hurriedly came to request that the procedures be completed, but at that time, Dr. Masaki reportedly did not respond at all.”